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 LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3

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Croatin
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Croatin


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PostSubject: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptyWed Jan 21, 2009 8:06 pm

Hewwo Hewwo, this is your friendly neighborhood Tin Tin speaking. Im here to provide the guild with a healthy dose of LOLZ and ROFLZ ^^ sooo, ima post a few jokes every now and then, i guess. Hope joo enjoy =3
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Croatin
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PostSubject: Joke #1 Darwin Awards 1995-1   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptyWed Jan 21, 2009 8:11 pm

The following isnt so much of a Joke as it is one really hilarious story about how some sorry s.o.b bit the dust. Enjoy ^^

The Arizona Highway Patrol were mystified when they came upon a pile of smoldering wreckage embedded in the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The metal debris resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it turned out to be the vaporized remains of an automobile. The make of the vehicle was unidentifiable at the scene.

The folks in the lab finally figured out what it was, and pieced together the events that led up to its demise.It seems that a former Air Force sergeant had somehow got hold of a JATO (Jet Assisted Take-Off) unit. JATO units are solid fuel rockets used to give heavy military transport airplanes an extra push for take-off from short airfields.

Dried desert lakebeds are the location of choice for breaking the world ground vehicle speed record. The sergeant took the JATO unit into the Arizona desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. He attached the JATO unit to his car, jumped in, accelerated to a high speed, and fired off the rocket.

The facts, as best as could be determined, are as follows:

The operator was driving a 1967 Chevy Impala. He ignited the JATO unit approximately 3.9 miles from the crash site. This was established by the location of a prominently scorched and melted strip of asphalt. The vehicle quickly reached a speed of between 250 and 300 mph and continued at that speed, under full power, for an additional 20-25 seconds. The soon-to-be pilot experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog-fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners.

The Chevy remained on the straight highway for approximately 2.6 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied the brakes, completely melting them, blowing the tires, and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface. The vehicle then became airborne for an additional 1.3 miles, impacted the cliff face at a height of 125 feet, and left a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock.

Most of the driver's remains were not recovered; however, small fragments of bone, teeth, and hair were extracted from the crater, and fingernail and bone shards were removed from a piece of debris believed to be a portion of the steering wheel.

Ironically a still-legible bumper sticker was found, reading"How do you like my driving? Dial 1-800-EAT-SHIT."
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donovanr
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptyThu Jan 22, 2009 12:31 am

LOL so funy! ☺☻

lol!
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Yoshirou
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptyThu Jan 22, 2009 1:37 am

Wow Lol
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Tastu
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptyThu Jan 22, 2009 6:17 pm

i...don't get it >< some guy died doing something stupid and irresponsible. how is that funny?

btw, is that first bit some sort of reference to South Park?? O-o
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Croatin
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptySat Jan 31, 2009 4:14 pm

[b]
Hello again =D Its time for the second edition of LOLz Corner with Tin Tin!! with yours truely... TIN TIN !!!

I hope you get a real kick outa this next Joke... which is more like a series of jokes...


These next 'Jokes' are things that were actually said in a real live court room with actual lawers and defendants and stuff like that. So all this stuff your about to read actually happened O.O''



Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
___________________________________
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
_____________________________________
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
______________________________________
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
_____________________________________
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
______________________________________
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
______________________________________
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?
______________________________________
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
______________________________________
Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
______________________________________
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
______________________________________
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
______________________________________
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere
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Tastu
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptySun Feb 01, 2009 7:19 pm

lol i like the ones about the doctor and autopsies Very Happy
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donovanr
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptyThu Feb 05, 2009 1:32 am

HAHAHAHA LOL i laughed so hard. this really is funy, where did u get it? ccant w8 till next time! Very Happy

lol!
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Croatin
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptySun Feb 22, 2009 6:54 pm

Hello followers of the Tin Tin!!! im sorry about not posting to you for the past two weeks... it hasnt been gewd for T3H TIN TIN. The first week i had the flu, so 99.98% of the time i was either sleeping, ir too tired to move. Then last week, my computer went Ka-poot. But im back now, and all's well =3.

I feel bad for leaving you guys with nothing for the past two weeks, so ima post TWO jokes for you this week =D. i know, you are all overjoyed and such. Take a chill pill, relax, and enjoy this weeks edition of Lolz Corner with Tin tin =D


______________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________

This first one isnt really so much of a joke as it is something slightly humerous and very interesting

Are you a Psycho ?????

This is a genuine psychological test.

It is a story about a girl. While at the funeral of her own mother, she met this guy whom she did not know. She thought this guy was amazing, so much the dream guy she was searching for that she fell in love with him right then and there but never asked for his name or number and afterward could not find anyone who knew who he was. A few! days later the girl killed her own sister.

Question: What is her motive in killing her sister?

Give this some thought for a while before you check the answer.

Answer: She was hoping that the guy would appear at the funeral again.

If you answered this correctly, you think like a psychopath. This was a test by a famous American psychologist used to test if one has the same mentality as a killer.
914 arrested serial killers took part in this test and 904 answered it correctly.

If you didn't answer correctly - good for you.
If your friends hit the jackpot, may I suggest that you keep your distance.

________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________

This next joke is funny, but is for mature audiences. I bleeped out the SINGLE bad word anyway, Enjoy


Judge: Look here Mickey Mouse, I cannot grant you a divorce from Minnie.
Mickey (stunned): Why not?

Judge: I have reviewed all the information you gave the court, but i can't find any evidence at all to support the grounds that she is crazy.

Mickey (exasperated): Your honor! I didn't say she was crazy... I said she was f***ing Goofy


________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________

I hope you enjoyed this week's edition of the lol! z corner with Tin Tin ^^
untill next week...


Thats all, Folks albino


Last edited by Croatin on Tue Feb 24, 2009 5:12 pm; edited 1 time in total
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donovanr
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PostSubject: Re: LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3   LOLz Corner with Tin Tin =3 EmptySun Feb 22, 2009 8:49 pm

the first one was funny, but as for the second one... *sigh* Crying or Very sad

"that which does not kill me has made a grave tactical error"
lol!
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